This, that and the other thing...

Seems to be the time of year for reflecting...maybe not the kitties on the bed, but reflecting about the holiday season and the year(s) ahead.  You see, today is my fourth anniversary of quitting smoking ( that syntax sounds poor, but I don't know how else to put it).  Yes, I was one of those, the people who have become the pariahs of our society.  I was one of those people who swore I would never quit, I really enjoyed smoking.  It was calming, it was self-medicating my ADD and it was a part of who I was.  Then it became a social no-no, making it impossible to enjoy a lot of things because smoking was not allowed, and I felt shunned even though no one ever uttered a word about wanting me to quit. I think my obsessive need to fit in is what finally did it.  Now, four years later, I am so happy to have that monkey off my back.

I am also thinking about the holiday season.  My youngest son was home from California for 3 days.  Due to circumstances beyond my control it is really the only time I get to see him and of course it is the busiest time of year.  I am frazzled at the holidays because, like many of you, I try to do too much.  I make all the same food year after year, I host the Christmas Eve dinner for 14 adults and of course I make the homemade donuts for Christmas morning.  The last few years I have struggled with the donuts, maybe because I only make them once a year now.  This year I got my donut mojo back...they were delicious.  Because they are so delicious and even better the next day they have to be made no sooner than the night of the 23rd and hidden...well hidden.  I leave a few out for the boys to sample on Christmas Eve day and then hide the rest so that they will available for coffee on Christmas morn.  This year I really stumped them, I am so proud!  They were so perplexed and it made me laugh just to think about how persistent they were and of course, how very clever I was!! And I never gave it up, even after they were all gone, so maybe, just maybe I can use the same spot next year!! It's the little things, don't you know.

The next big reflection is the upcoming birthday.  On one side I know that some people don't get to have a 60th birthday and I feel lucky that I am physically and mentally healthy ( although some would challenge that notion), but 6-0 is such a big number.  Where did all those years go?  You look back and think that you are maybe 40 and then realize that you are 60, 6-0.  I feel like maybe all this introspection  is a 3/4 life crisis.  I never got a chance to have a midlife crisis.  Like most women, I was just too darned busy raising kids, working, adjusting to a new marriage and blending a family and all the other things we women do and do and do.  So, there you have it..I will be 60 and I just don't know what to do with it or where to integrate it into my thoughts and dreams.

That being said, my wonderful husband is taking me away on our first winter vacation ever to celebrate the big event.  It's easy for him to celebrate because he is 3 years younger and I will forever be known as the Cougar in his eyes.  So, we will be off on yes, a cruise to the Western Caribbean on the NCL Epic in February.  First we will fly to Florida for my first ever time in the Sunshine State.   I have always had a healthy distrust of Florida because of a book I read in the 4th grade about a family vacationing in Florida.  The precarious situation with the drawbridge, perhaps an impending storm and the stay at a cinder block motel has made me wary.  I have tried to find the book to re-read it and exorcise the demons, but alas no luck.  I recently found the book "The Pink Motel" which was published at the right time, but alas was not THE book. If any of you children of the 50s remember such a book, please advise ;) But, I ramble..........
We will stay in Hollywood Beach for two nights before going on the cruise to Costa Maya, Roatan and Cozumel.  All details are in order: tickets for Blue Man Group and Cirque de Soleil aboard the ship are reserved, dinner at Cagneys ( our favorite steak restaurant on NCL) is reserved for our last night at sea, tour to the ruins in Costa Maya and a private tour of Roatan featuring the botanical and butterfly gardens and lots of photo ops for Bob is a done deal.  Now it is just the wait....and while I wait the "big day" will come and go without major fanfare I hope.

OK, enough reflecting.  I need to get out of this computer chair and prepare to run to the airport to pick up my oldest son who has been in Raleigh visiting his Dad.

Later,
Janet